Thursday, September 02, 2004

postponed

My husband called the urologist's office today and rescheduled his consult. For October. but he also scheduled his biopsy for two days following the consult.

Waiting until October to find out if we have any viable sperm seems like waiting for forever, but because of my husband's work schedule, there was no way he'd be able to have his biopsy until October anyway. And it seems silly for him to fly all the way to DC for a short meeting with the doctor. This way, he can get it done in one fell swoop.

I'm surprising okay with having to wait. It helps that I'm working again (and today went much better than yesterday, thank you very much) so I don't have as much free time to obsess over our infertility. And in a way, I'm glad to be able to dive into work over the next couple of months without worrying that I'll have to take time off for my first IVF cycle.

I no realize just how naive I was to believe that we'd be starting IVF in September. Now, if we get the go-ahead for November, I'll feel grateful. But something tells me not to get my hopes up. Probably the horrible odds that Dr. Hope gave us for finding sperm. The more I think about those numbers 5-20%, the more I realize just how fucked we really are.

Still, 5-20% is better than 0-15% and we'll just have to wait until October to know for sure whether my husband can beat the odds.

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