Tuesday, June 01, 2004

ay carumba!

So, I'm finally jumping on the blog bandwagon after thinking about it for some time now. More than anything else, I need something semi-constructive to do with my time.

Just came back from the gym- my one structured daily activity in my life here. That is, if you don't count showering and my daily trips to the superama. Sure, I was working when I first got here, but left the job due to, um, lets just call it an emotionally unhealthy environment. That was over a year ago. So now I find myself living the life of a stay-at-home mom, minus the kids. It's not exactly where I expected to find myself at 31. But then again, neither is Mexico. I came here for love. (Isn't that always the way it is?) And love I have, which should be enough and I suppose it is in most regards. But I have to admit that I'm getting a bit restless. Unfortunately, the job market here isn't all that promising. I am looking. And I was recently told (recently being the end of April), that I'm a semi-finalist for a position that I applied for. But I'm still waiting to hear from them. Am still waiting to find out if I've made the list of finalists. And if I have, well, who knows how long it will take to find out if I actually get the job. My friends in the states assure me that its a non-profit thing. But I've worked for non-profits before and this seems to me to be more of a Mexico thing.

Anyway, I've given myself a deadline of sorts. More like I've given my husband a deadline. And that is: if I remain unemployed or if I don't get pregnant, we're out of here next July when his job contract runs out. So those are my two goals right now. To find a job and/or get knocked up. Neither is as easy as I'd hoped.

I know that there are plenty of things that I can do with my time here(it's a huge city after all)and I was studying Spanish after my first failed attempt at working in Mexico. But at the end of the day, I really just don't want to be here. I miss my former life. I miss having friends around. I miss working. I miss understanding what's going on around me without the help of dictionary. And so, I'm hoping that something happens soon.


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